Category: Blog-Soulful Living

Posted on by

Got Stress? Breathe Through It

There’s a lot going on in the world.    

By that I mean your personal world and the global world we all share.  Fires. Viruses. Refugee Crisis. Political Mayhem. 

Plus lots of personal stressors. Current and historical.  Including the good kind.  

If we’re taking an honest look about (and within), we may recognize this has always been the case.  Tragedy.  Celebration. Break downs. New Explorations. Scary news. Heartwarming stories. Badness. Goodness. 

Life holds everything. It always will. 

Depending upon how you were raised and what you experienced, times of challenge may be experienced in different ways. 

If you walked on eggshells as a kid, you may be susceptible to walking on them now.

Unless you’ve retrained your system.  If you were helped to manage ups and downs with empowering strategies, positive mindset, and sturdy role models, you’ll likely experience more resilience.  Especially if you’ve taught yourself over time to flow more easily with everyday challenges or big scary world events. 

Everyone has the potential to “soothe their system” in the face of challenge. 

I view this as an essential skill on the path to sturdiness. 

Feeling steady within your being is a definite benefit regardless of whether you are facing a minor disruption to your wellbeing or feel you can’t hold your head above water one more moment. 

So how do you soothe your system?

Simple.  No matter what you are facing, you breathe through it.  The “it” in every case is the challenging experience (or group of triggering experiences) that you are facing when your anxiety, temper, heart rate, helplessness, or story telling escalates.

Breathing through it is a simple and effective technique. 

In fact, it’s so simple that a lot of folks dismiss it in favor of allowing the mind to run willy nilly, dragging the body along for the ride.  I hope you aren’t one of those people. 

Let’s break it down. 

Your stress response system was designed to keep you alive and procreating.  Since you are part of the human race, it looks like that goal is being accomplished.

When faced with a threat, this system uses a multistep process to send forth the first responder hormones adrenaline, norepinephrine, and cortisol.  You know the drill – you have a surge of energy and greater focus so that you can run away or fight the threat. 

Trouble is, most of these tigers and pirates live in our minds – replaying like age old dramas or remakes of age old dramas. 

When a car cuts you off on the highway, the fast flowing adrenaline helps you react swiftly.  And the body allows the stress hormones to process through your system.  You feel the recovery as your heartbeat and breath pattern return to normal and the heat in your body subsides. 

Whew!  Dodged a disaster and off you go, singing show tunes. 

Unless of course, you keep replaying the scene and your upset over in your mind.  In that case, the stress hormones keep pumping and you keep being disturbed. (Who’s the pirate now?)

It is rare that you face an actual threat.  Most stress arrives by way of your fixation on the tigers and pirates who show up as deadlines, bosses, disappointing people, illness, financial stress, and replays of the past hurts of your life.

And when there is worrying and rumination, your body continually releases cortisol. 

This is all too common in the hectic, connected world you live in. Unfortunately, cortisol as a habit can suppress the immune system, increase sugar and blood pressure, contribute to weight gain, disrupt sleep, produce acne, and generally disrupt a felt sense of sturdy wellbeing.

Too much worrying and stressing, without the presence of actual tigers and pirates, keeps you walking on eggshells. 

Here’s the good news.  You have the power to change that. 

Even if your stress response system is hyper alert after years of vigilance (due perhaps to real threat if abuse of any kind was present in your environment).  Understanding the protective intent of a system which has become habitually overactive allows you to release judgement and just breathe.

Here are some (really) simple steps which can, over time create a new bodily response to stress.

 

1.  Notice you are stressed (cue physical symptoms, emotional upset, mental rumination).

2.  Cross your palms and place them in the center of your chest.  (This is called HeartBreathing – a technique in Heart Assisted Energy Psychology.) 

3. Close your eyes, if possible, and focus on your hands, heart, and breath.  

4.  Invite your breathing to slow and your exhale to lengthen. (You can inhale to a count of 4 and exhale to a count of 6.)

5.  Say a positive statement, mantra, or self encouragement to keep you focused on the calming action of HeartBreathing and away from the stress trigger. (“I am safe in this moment. I am taking good care of myself. Breathing calms my body and mind.”)

6. Flip your hands and continue HeartBreathing.  

7. Aim to continue the self-encouraging, positive statements while HeartBreathing (occasionally switching palms) for 4 to 5 minutes. Talk aloud if it helps you maintain your focus.

8.  Notice the way you feel now.  HeartBreathe as you notice the changes in your system.  Claim it:  “I soothed my system.  I did this.  I can calm myself.” 

A (really) simple practice with many immediate and long term benefits. Let’s take a look at what they are.

1. The long exhale activates the parasympathetic nervous system.  The calming “brake” on the fight or flight response. 

2.The HeartBreathing enables the heart to return to a coherent rhythm and communicate the desire for regulation of the body (physically, energetically, chemically, electromagnetically). Dysregulation increases stress as you have frequently experienced.

3. A coherent heart rhythm also turns off the production of stress hormones such as cortisol and turns on the feel good, helpful hormones such as DHEA. 

4. The positive, self-soothing statements refocuses the mind away from the impending threat and creates a positive mindset.

5. Staying focused for 4 to 5 minutes allows the cortisol and other stress chemicals to be processed by the liver so they are no longer preparing the body to fight or flee. 

6. As your heart rhythm encourages coherence throughout your body, you have greater access to your frontal lobe with its higher order problem solving capacity.

7. All the while you are creating new neural pathways (allowing the brain to change), creating habits which support sturdiness, and discovering your capacity to alter your response to the challenges of the world.

Soothing your system takes a few minutes.  Creating a new approach to life’s challenges will likely take a lot of practice. 

I’m assuming you are an adult.  So that means you have a lot of years of reactive stress habits.  My suggestion is to not wait until you are in the midst of a self or other induced stress event to see if this works.  Just like lifting weights over time increases muscle mass, this practice can help reset the way your system responds to the good and not so good stressors in your life.  

Everyone walks on eggshells sometimes. 

Or gets lost in a mental rant about something that isn’t happening with someone who isn’t there.  If you are interested in a future that involves fewer Chicken Little responses,  practice this a lot.  

Calmer and smarter, you remember other ways to take care of yourself during challenging times. 

Wash your hands. Send positive prayers to the world. Turn off the constant news. Eat good food. Focus on your wellbeing rather than a possible pirate with a virus. 

Above all, remember that the world needs a calm, sturdy center.  Could that be you?

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

HeartBreathing and Energy Psychology. You know it’s my favorite thing to teach. Let’s just look at the breath. Veterans learned yogic breathing techniques. Why? Respiration is one of the autonomic functions you can control. Slow and deep breathing. Calming the fight or flight response. In one week, symptoms eased. One year later, even without maintenance of breathing techniques, symptoms were significantly decreased. Slow, deep breathing. Can’t say enough about it.

Posted on by

Talking to Angels

Have you been talking to Angels?

Yeah, me too.  How’s that going? 

(That’s a real question.)

I really wonder what it’s like for you when you chat with the Angels.  I’d love to know the details. The Who, What About, When, How, How often and What happens type of details.  I’d love to know how they respond and how you know it’s them.    

I want to know what doesn’t happen.  Where it doesn’t work, when you doubt (them, you), when you forget them, when they remind you. When they disappoint you.  Or you them.

(Spoiler alert. That last option just isn’t a possibility.  Ever.)  

I want to know all of it.  So, email me.  I’ll read it. I’ll send you a guided meditation as a thank you.  Which one.  Don’t know.  I’m sure “they” will tell me.  

You know how you get so used to your way of doing things, you forget there are other ways?  That’s me.  Hence, my (real) question.

It’s a big world out there.  Lots of humans.  The cosmos is even bigger.  Lots of celestial conversationalists available for a (snap) chat. I wonder if you’re the chatty kind – talking all day to humans and light beings.  Or if you spend most of your time with one group over another.  Maybe you only talk (to humans or angels) when you really need something.  I wonder what it’s like for you.

I don’t read books about how to connect with Angels anymore. 

Not for years.  I read a bunch in the beginning.  They opened a new world to me and I’m deeply grateful for them. I liked having information about the Angels: names, roles, descriptions and ways to translate Angelic guidance.  This initial structure gave me the foundational knowledge and ideas about how I figure it all worked.  

I didn’t realize how these books also kept me bound within limited ideas about the Angelic Presence.  

I do remember the exact moment that door opened.  

I was offering an Angel reading as part of my practicum to become an Angel Healing Practitioner  You can just picture me.  My face and insides all screwed up in concentration as I “tried” to translate something that sounded like Angelic guidance.  Lots of tension. Lots of effort.

Until something akin to a tap on my right shoulder was followed by a question.  

“Do you mind if We take it from here?”

“Have at it!”  My relief was palpable. My knowing clear. My trust complete. 

From that day on, talking to Angels has become as natural as breathing. So has listening to Angels, streaming Angelic Conversations for others, consulting with them on all my life decisions, and helping you find your own way into this ongoing conversation. 

I know you have the skill to do the same.  I have zero doubt on that belief.  

Why so sure? I’ve sat with thousands of people throughout the years.  Heard so many Angel connection stories. Witnessed so many beautiful partnerships, heartfelt wisdom translations, and bodyfelt receptivity to the Angelic Presence.  Too many to count.  So, I know you absolutely have the skill to enter the conversation more fully.  

I just wonder where you’re bound. 

By your limited beliefs. By your doubt in yourself. By your experience (evidence) of not being responded to.  By your disappointments. By your perception that others can do this, but not you.  

I lived all of that.  Fully embodied disempowerment all the while I was having marginal success “talking with Angels.”

Those days are gone. These days I’m clear: the only time I’m not engaged with these lovely messengers is when I’ve left the conversation.  When I’ve narrowed my perception, my thinking, my awareness.  When I’ve gotten lost in one of my countless human stories that lead me to believe I’m separate from this ongoing flowing dialogue. 

These days I know the Angels are always Live Streaming.  

And, unbeknownst to most, you are always engaged in some level at that conversation.   

I wonder what your myths are about how this flowing, streaming beautiful conversation is “suppose to” happen.  

Myths.  Plural.  They are like locked doors – keeping you outside looking in at those who can talk to Angels, easily translate celestial wisdom, access deep Truth. These myths are keeping you separate from someone like me.  Just like my myths kept me in the “I’m not intuitive like you” camp for way too long.

This myth is not true. Just a distorted story which disempowers.  

 

There are lots of myths about how the Angelic conversation is supposed to happen.  If you’ve witnessed me live streaming – which is most typical when I teach, guide a meditation, offer an Angel Healing session, or an Angel Card Reading – you’ve witnessed one way of flow.   

I’d love to also talk about how damn awkward these conversations with Angels can be. 

To help you understand their nonlinear nature. How conversations unfold over time, across various messengers, and skip around topics. How the information is often cryptic, symbolic, and multisensory. How they show up at the most inopportune times.

How they pick up the conversation with abrupt questions, laughter when things aren’t funny, and challenges to act when it makes no sense.

About how to open to their rants about how much you are loved, cherished, and enjoyed. To let yourself feel the feels and experience the otherworldly even when it is physically disorienting or confusing.

I’d love to help you open to this Angelic live stream. 

I’m really invested in the other Angelic Invitation I received those many years ago.  “Teach them what they are already capable of.”  That’s what I’ve been doing for years now.  

Empowering you to discover how you (already) work.

Every workshop, retreat, and service I offer will help you discover more of your innate capacity to communicate with the Angels.  With every higher level of Wisdom regardless of what it is called.  This is what you are capable of. 

I invite you to WholeHeartedly, consciously, and freely enter the conversation. 

If you’re wanting personal instruction, hit me up for an Angelic Healing Journey.  It’s all about you as the Angels and other Wise Guides show up to answer your questions, invite themselves to hang out with you on a daily basis, and give you some hints for elevating your life.

Above all, remember this: You really don’t need me, or anyone, to show you the way.

You already know how to talk and listen.  You’ve already had beautiful and awkward conversations with all kinds of beings. Relax and have at it. If you want a guide, pick up a book, grab an Angel Card Deck, or find a teacher/mentor. 

All lead to the same place: your own Awesomeness.

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

More than half of all adults in the US report feeling protected by a Guardian Angels, even those not considered religious.  One survey polled 1,700 respondents of diverse religious faiths: evangelical Protestants, black Protestants, mainline Protestants, Catholics and Jews. The finding that 55% affirmed a belief in guardian angels across religious, educational, and regional lines. Apparently, those angels really get around.

Posted on by

What’s it Gonna Take?

 

What’s it gonna take for this family to stop bringing home plastic grocery bags?

This was the question running through my mind as I grabbed a bag full of plastic bags to bring to the recycle bin at the food store.   It was a real question and not one of blame. How to instill an unshakable habit of using our recyclable bags. 

Only 1% of single use plastic bags are actually recycled. Sad fact.

I reflected on how this bag of bags got here in my garage.  My husband running to the store for just a few items. My daughter buying something at Target.  Friends and family showing up with things in plastic bags. And me? 

I was feeling kind of proud of myself.  

The puffed up, blind kind of “aren’t I something” proud.  Thinking how I’ve pretty much mastered bringing my own bags everything. Then  I recalled that time in November when I blew my commitment to no plastic bags at the Macy’s shoe counter. 

I apparently couldn’t walk out of Macy’s with a stack of three shoe and boot boxes.  

Ok, but still, not bad.  Til I remembered shopping for SisterHood’s Holiday gift drive. Yup.  I bought hundreds of toys (due to generous donations) and 95% of them came home in plastic bags. All donations came in plastic bags. And all family bags (for 250 kids) travelled to SisterHood in big trash bags.  I’ve got to rethink that one next December.  

What’s it gonna take to run a gift drive without plastic bags? 

Later in the day, I enjoyed my ice tea at Barnes and Noble while I worked in the cafe. I recycled my single use plastic cup and had to throw out the straw.   What’s it gonna take to not use plastic cups when I’m out?  And how will I never, ever use a plastic straw again? (I’m thinking of the saddest photo showing how these straws interact with my favorite ocean creatures).

This question had taken on a life of its own.  It wasn't rhetorical and was waiting for action. 

 

So, I packed 3 reusable straws in my purse and a plastic Starbucks cup in my car.  I reinforced that commitment when I pulled out my straw at lunch over the weekend.  (The trick is to remember to take it home again!)  New habits created when a simple question prompts action. 

What’s it gonna take to not overspend at the food store? 

I wasn’t reaching for that question anymore, but it was reaching for me.  Inside Wegmans, I paused and considered my normal approach. I intend to get a few items and end up throwing twice that in my cart. This leaves me reaching for my credit card.  What’s it gonna take?  I checked my cash and determined I wouldn’t spend more than I had.

Shopping for food became a whole new adventure. And it included math. 

If you know me, you know math is not my strong suit.  Still, I travelled around making wise decisions and figured I was good.  I was good.  Just 18 cents short.  Lucky for me I had a hidden $10 bill in my wallet or something was going back.

What’s it gonna take to send all of the Love O kids to school next year? 

I was talking with Ahaji, founder of We the Village which supports everything for Love Orphanage in Haiti.  We were strategizing about the Be a Difference Maker education fund to send all the kids to school next year. Exploring some options, I wondered about the monthly commitment.

“$21 a month sends one kid to school. How many kids are covered that way?”

“12 kids aren’t funded.”  I was taken aback.  Clearly I had let that ball drop given that I was a Difference Maker committed to helping Love O kids get funded.  The conversation shifted from labor intensive fundraising to a simpler task.

Let’s find 12 people willing to make a $21 monthly donation.

What’s it gonna take?  Not much apparently.  Perhaps we just tell people about it and see where that very simple action takes us.  (If you want to transform a life through education, please check out my Making a Difference page to get the whole story.)

What’s it gonna take?

It’s only been 5 days since that question arose. I’ll spare you the rest of the situations it prompted me to notice. Which led to a tiny action. Which opens the potential for change within me.

Why am I WholeHeartedly engaging the question?

Because it showed up.  I trust Life’s wise invitations when they catch my attention. And because I truly want to be a beneficial contributor to the wellbeing of all of us and this lovely planet. 

What’s it gonna take to finish this story?  “The End.”

Thanks for listening. Hope this question  opens that place within you where it is easy to see options and take action.  Tiny or big. 

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

Inventors, entrepreneurs, social change agents, artists, and scientists view the art of questioning as essential to discovery. Whether to create something original or solve a dilemma, questions invite the mind to open. Often leading creative thinkers to effective solutions, new paradigms, or original ideas. With self awareness, you can often trace an invention, change in habit, or adoption of an entirely new perspective back to a single question. Let your questions breathe.  They do their best work when you don’t rush to answer them!

Posted on by

Looking for Kindness in all the Right Places

I merged with ease onto the highway, as I’ve done countless times before.

I slowed a bit to let the big white pickup truck with a trailer pass by before I claimed my space.  Gazing forward at the open road, I realized the pick up driver had moved over to make room for me.

I was struck by the kindness of that simple maneuver.   

Seriously struck. My heart warmed as those feel good chemicals zoomed around my brain and body.  In my mind, I was crystal clear that he had offered me a kindness.  It wasn’t just good driving protocol or a desire to save his shiny new truck from a potential run in. How did I know?  I’ve no idea, but I knew. 

So did my open mind, warm heart, and tingling body. 

I basked in that experience as I drove. Then a question arose. 

How many subtle moments of intentional kindness do I miss each day? 

I recognized that question offered me an invitation to play. So, I drove on – alert in my pursuit of kindness. The tiny, easy to miss kind.  Whether it was intentional or habitual didn’t matter.  Noticing what was already happening was.

I took a new route to keep me from going mindless while driving. 

Winding through neighborhoods on a lovely day surprisingly showed kindness everywhere. Drivers let others merge or walkers cross the street. A man picked up random trash. Doors were held in local shops. A lady kissed a neighbor’s dog.

Smiles exchanged. Lots of drivers waving at each other. 

The thank you, go ahead kind of waving. Nary a middle finger in sight.  

I stayed alert while exploring a new grocery store. 

A mom was kind to her frustrated child. Staff helped find stuff.  A young girl smiled as she paused in her stocking for me to roll my cart by. 3 times she paused and smiled. (I was a bit lost).  My cashier was to die for kind and even helped me put the cart away as I grabbed my bags by the front door. 

I went to Trader Joe’s next.  Happy.  Watching lots of nice people manage a crazy crowded parking lot.  

Same story indoors. After a bit of noticing all the help all around, I zoned out and stood in line.  I tuned in and felt the unity within me.  Happy.  Feeling the benefit of witnessing so much kindness.  I brought my attention outward and saw a laughing couple enjoying a really friendly cashier.

I heard ladies laughing behind me. Strangers apparently.  

Mind back on autopilot, I half heard a woman cheerfully mention she just got rid of a house full of tweens after a sleepover.  She had laundry in the washer and dishes in the dishwasher when her husband mentioned they were out of tea.  So here she was on Superbowl Sunday at Trader Joes with the rest of New Jersey. 

I was thinking that was mighty kind. 

I was thinking about how I felt after those sleepover days.  My husband would’ve been lucky to get a cup of tea. No way I would’ve run out for that one item. Let alone do it cheerfully. 

(Note to self - still more growing up to do.)

 

I heard her ask the manager, perched in his official birds nest, if he could ring up her 1 item. He didn’t have a register.

That woke me up. 

“Please, go in front of me.”   “Oh no, I couldn’t.”   “Please”  (really more like “Puleeeaase, it is so not a big deal).  It was a no brainer. 

“That was kind,” said the (really friendly) cashier. 

I hadn’t even thought about the kindness thing.  It just happened.  Habitual kindness.  Noticed and commented on.  I wondered if he might be playing the same game, so I smiled at him knowingly (sounds creepy when I write it).

Asking me to wait a second, he had a word with the floating manager. I packed my groceries and got my change. 

Then he handed me a tiny bouquet of flowers. 

“Thanks for being kind,” said my game playing buddy.  Intentional kindness met habitual kindness.  Really, truly sweet. 

It showed me a new level of the game. 

I could notice acts of kindness happening and I could intentionally create a few of my own.  I walked out and saw a woman struggle to lift her bags out of the cart. And leave the cart precariously poised to drift right into that shiny luxury car parked by the door. Intentionally, I returned the cart. 

Playing the game at this level – noticing and contributing – reminded me of my favorite square dancing move.

It’s been a (really) long time since my High School gym days, but I think it’s called a chain.  All cliques represented as we joined hands, laughed, danced, and wove through each other with great enthusiasm.  Once we all agreed square dancing was hokey and weird, we were free to thoroughly enjoy ourselves.

I remember that feeling of an open mind, warm heart, and tingling body.

It struck me then that Life invites us to play a lot of different games.  It doesn’t seem to matter which one you choose.  Just that it takes you into that warm, sweet experience of being a contributing part of this human family.   

I believe there is a lot of good going on in our world. 

Depends what you are looking for and what you’ve got to add. 

I hope you find your game today.

And discover the joy of playing, the playmates who await you, and that inner tingle. I hope you  inadvertently make someone’s day and cause a chain reaction of goodness. 

p.s.  I also remember playing with those little scooters in gym. Jumping on the trampoline. Routines on a tiny balance beam (8 inches off the floor).  Volley ball and my killer serve. Softball on gorgeous days.  Thinking back on it, gym class was so much fun. 

What about you?  I’m sticking with fun … as long as I block out days running around the track, playing basketball, and wearing that mandatory sleeveless, one piece polyester gym suit.

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

Kindness: the gift that keeps on giving. University of California researchers found an increase in positive feelings and life satisfaction, and a decrease in negative feelings, when participants performed acts of kindness, recalled acts of kindness, or did both. Next time you feel down or stressed, pull up a memory of when you were kind to someone to improve your own well-being.

Posted on by

Let’s Heal Those 10 Bodies, Shall We?

“Let’s heal those 10 bodies, shall we?”

I was minding my own business when I heard that phrase float through my head.  My response was immediate: “I’m in!”   I got the reference to the Kundalini Yogic teaching that each person has 10 interconnected, mutually influencing energetic bodies.  Invisible and influential.

The physical body is just the one that you can see. 

The other 9 energy bodies are there, albeit not seen, known, or understood by those who haven’t been raised or exposed to this perspective.

If raised in a culture which incorporates this knowledge, this is not front page news. 

Many in Western culture are now aware of references to the energy centers (chakras), pathways (nadis, meridians), or energetic layers of the body (biofield, aura).  Some are curious. Some are critical. Some are uninterested.  And many remain innocently ignorant.

Yet all are influenced by the energetic architecture of their bodies. 

In wisdom traditions and healing systems worldwide and throughout history, there is an awareness of this influential, invisible world.  It is the world of energy – the infrastructure of reality as we perceive it.  From this perspective, the whole must be considered for healing since everything effects everything. 

Think of the complexity within the miracle of your body – the one you can see.

Without you paying the slightest bit of attention, your food gets digested, oxygen is recycled, bones grow, learning happens, toxins are released, and the world’s sensory information gets translated.  All while you are driving to the food store.  This idea is amazing, yet hasn’t even scratched the surface of the wonder of your physical body.

Now multiple the wonder by 10.

I don’t find it a coincidence that I heard this invitation this week.  Looking ahead in my calendar, I see my next 3 scheduled events offer the chance to immerse within the healing frequencies of sound, energy, light, and celestial healers. 

All with less effort than going to the gym, starting a new diet, or building a positive mindset. 

 

Chanting in the Light Cathedrals at Soul Sanctuary invites you to hang out in the comfy, candlelit salon while singing/chanting the yogic mantras of kundalini yoga with a bunch of lovely people.  Angelic Spavasanaaah at Live in Joy Yoga invites you to lay down in a comfy nest while I guide you on an Angel Journey and body/energy workers lovingly attend to you. It is so relaxing, you might just sleep through it. The Angelic Immersion Retreat at Soul Sanctuary offers too much to put in a sentence.  Let’s just say it is heavenly. So, what do they all have in common?

Immersing all 10 of your lovely bodies within healing energy. 

There are lots of benefits to these (and other) practices.  Perhaps the most important is assisting your body to return to a more harmonized state. So you can release the effects of chronic tension, balance the endocrine system, invite brain hemispheric coherence, boost immunity, and my favorite, bringing your heart rhythm (the great influencer) into a coherent state.  Thus, inviting your whole body (all 10 of them) to communicate more efficiently and effectively.  To return to a conversation of Wholeness or what we call healing.

Simply put, you get to lower your overall stress and increase your overall wellbeing.  And the really good news?

These aren’t the only activities that engage the healing response for your entire system.  There are so many ways you can explore the healing technology of working with energy, mind, body, and emotions.  Yoga.  Meditation. Time in nature. Alternative healing. Energy Psychology and Energy Medicine. Chi Gong. Sound healing. Laughing with best friends and strangers. Petting your dog. Witnessing beauty. Offering and receiving a kindness.

You get the idea.  Choose your way.  Set your intent for healing in all 10 energy bodies.  And let the magic happen.

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

The field of affective neuroscience explores the neural circuitry in the brains of every mammal, rats to human. The Circuits include Care, Play, Fear, Lust, Seeking, Rage, and Grief. Let’s focus on the first two.  Practicing self-compassion activates the Care Circuit. Soothing negative emotions leaves you calm and centered.  So, practice self-compassion. A lot. The Play Circuit softens negative affect with humor and enjoyable activities. So, laugh more. Enjoy more. Play more. Your brain and life will change.

Posted on by

Hindsight is Foresight for 2020

The New Year has begun. And January 1st feels like a dim memory.

Has it only been 16 days since we entered a new decade full of optimism (or holiday fatigue for some)?  I recall January 1st. I was nestled under a blanket by the Christmas tree as my top 5 priorities for 2020 seemingly wrote themselves onto the page in my journal. (And yes, I was surprise by what topped that list!).

Why then is my memory of that lovely “me time” so dim today?  

I clearly see how a busy schedule with lots of interactions, to do-ing, and planning could easily lead me onto the mindless treadmill.  Without a commitment to tune into those dreams (goals) on a weekly basis, I would easily succumb to sleep walking through the year. But that is not gonna happen to me this year.

I’m unwilling to give up on myself that easily.  Nor do I wish to squander the precious moments of this Life. 

Intent is important, as are self-reflection, Soul dreaming, Treasure Mapping, practical action, and personal commitment to follow through.  Looking at the time segment of one year (2020), I began with my intent to discern what my Soul is dreaming for the year.  I did this on the 1st and you can do it whenever you choose.  (Hint: if self-reflection isn’t scheduled, it likely won’t happen).  What do you do once that time is scheduled?  Try this process.

Settle within the depth of your being and ask your Soul for the top 5 priorities for this year. 

This isn’t a thinking exercise nor a creation process from the small mind.  It is simple and entirely doable.  Settle into a quiet space with the intent to drop within your being and talk with your soul.  Ask the top 5 priorities question and record the answers.  Don’t overthink this, make it complicated, or use too many words.  It is quick, flowing, and at times nonlinear.  Sometimes the list completes itself as you shower, commute to work, or do an errand.  Soul time, not linear time.  

Pay attention and have some fun. The Soul wants to download the Map Markers for the year.  So let it. 

Once the list writes itself, keep those priorities in front of you.  Visually. Post them in your bathroom so they are viewed morning and night.  Write them in your journal and create a bookmark that moves through your journal. Create time in your week to review these priorities and how you are living them (or not). If you snooze, you lose focus.   Self-correction on a weekly basis requires only small tweaks to course correct.  This is practical and ultimately less painful than the need for a massive overhaul when you’ve wandered off the Soulful path.  

 

Hindsight is Foresight when utilizing the benefit of Reverse Treasure Mapping. 

 

To discover those clues revealing how you lived the past year, ask the 3-3-1-1 questions.   

The Treasure Mapping Process is endlessly creative, flexible, and playful. When mapping a new year, it is useful to reverse the playful exploration of clue’s on the path forward.  To do this, mentally float back over the previous year to discover your patterns of growth and stagnation. 

What 3 useful actions (habits) did I establish last year which moved me forward in the direction of my personal goals and Soul intent?

What were 3 habits which interfered with me moving forward in the direction of my personal goals and Soul intent?  

What is 1 habit-action that I have yet to cultivate which will most significantly move me in the direction of my 2020 priorities?

 

What is 1 habit-action I must release in order to significantly move me in the direction of my 2020 priorities?

Drop in, ask the questions, witness what arises in your mind/memory, and identify the habit-actions which answer the questions.  Look for established habits rather than temporary phases (eg, drinking 8 glasses of water every day rather than here and there when thirsty).  Spend some time recalling the intent, effort, strategies, and most importantly, the reason you chose to create these new habits. 

Reverse Treasure Mapping allows you to celebrate your gains as well as identify how to best support your intentions.

A few words to those of you who are human. You have the capacity for self-reflection which is an essential component of your evolution.  You also have the capacity for self-criticism when looking at what you did and did not accomplish.  Be kind.  Humans have growing pains.  Don’t add to the pain by berating yourself. That is the internalized critical voice which knows nothing about dreaming and everything about shutting you down. 

Empower your dreams, don’t crush them before they sprout. 

You can use the Reverse Treasure Mapping Process for your 5 Top Priorities or for each item.  Your choice.  Your way.  Your 2020. Remember the power of scheduling time for self reflection, the huge benefit of tiny action consistently applied, and befriending yourself throughout the process. 

If you want to tune into your Soulful Map for 2020, join me for a Treasure Mapping adventure on Saturday, January 25th. 

I’ll help you amp up your intuitive superpower, engage the Oracle of Soul Sanctuary, and venture out into the ‘real world’ for a scavenger hunt. Discovering the clues for your 2020 Soulful Map is child’s play. 

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

It doesn’t take much to kick start the habit of self reflection. You are wired for this natural action.  Pairing an open ended question with quiet time for daydreaming is incredibly restorative for your mind-body-emotion connection.  Allowing space to meander, wonder, and wander without the distraction of everyday tasks opens the mind.  Within a relaxed, curious state, images, ideas, and insights float in and out. Add a dose of neutrality as you witness without any pressure to record, decide, or act upon these ideas.  Daydreaming is under utilized. especially given the proven benefits to health and success. Ready, set, daydream.

Posted on by

This Decade I’m Gonna Change the World

The music was blaring. My muscles were straining. My mind started protesting.

Laying on my back, lifting my barbell with 40 other fit souls, I wondered if I had the strength for those last 16 press ups.  I was thinking that I was pretty much done.  Glad I hadn’t added that extra weight.  Feeling myself weaken as my mind exercised it’s questioning voice.

“Finish strong!  You can do it!” encouraged the teacher. 

“Damn straight I can!” responded my mind. 

Miraculously, strength poured through my shaking arms as I finished every last one of those stinkin’ reps.   And the positive mind rules again, I thought.  My body popped up as I prepared for the next set.  I started strong as my mind noted how much it liked this song. 

Positive mind + motivating instructor + really good music. 

I recognized the benefit of this equation outside the gym.  I thought about how I used this formula to enhance creativity, personal interactions, teaching, meditation, and business planning.

My mind wandered. My strength and coordination promptly waned.

Bringing my focus back to the moment, I realized how important it was to stay present to the physical experience of the class. Whenever my mind travelled some tangent, I lost my rhythm, couldn’t follow directions, and felt weaker. 

Interesting. 

I watched my mind wander and my body’s energy follow.  I felt my mind focus and my physical energy strengthen.  “Where attention goes, energy flows.”  Got it!  Heading into the next power set, I was clear, in sync, strong, and capable. 

“It’s our first class of 2020!  What are you gonna create this decade?”   

“This is the decade I’m gonna change the world!” declared my mind.   

This statement was so clear, strong, and in sync with my mind, body, motivation, and energy that I thought I had spoken aloud. Which wouldn’t have been a bad thing, I suppose.  I thought about the audacity of that statement, willing to let my concentration and coordination slip a bit.  What the heck does that even mean, I wondered.  And then it hit me. 

Of course I can change the world.  And I am determined to do so.

Back in the groove and loving the club version of the most played song of 2019 (an oldie, but goodie – Uptown Funk), I was strong and clear.  Physics, spirituality, psychology, yogic philosophy, mysticism, and deep inner knowing all point in the same direction. 

We create the world around us through our conditioned projections.

 

Self concept, perception of other people, interactions, situations, events, past memory and the elusive future are all influenced by the projections of our state of mind. Fueled by the conditioned beliefs we formed and absorbed as we grew.  What a woman thinketh, she becomes. 

As within, so without.  As above, so below. 

When we are frightened, the world is a frightening place. When we are hating on ourselves, it is easy to hate on others or expect rejection. When we are on top of the world, it is easy to imagine and attain success, positive experiences, and lots of feel good exchanges.  When we are motivated and committed to health and vitality, we encounter all sorts of support within and around us to become vitally healthy.

When we have a positive mind, encouraging instructor, and great music, we power through barbell class. 

My world – inner and outer – could absolutely change.  This was clear and absolutely attainable.  The formula?  Noticing any time my mind wandered away from what was actually happening as it ventured into my daydream, rumination, or nightmares.  Anytime I argued with Life, I would be reminded that some inner idea of Kathy Milano was declaring that “thing” should be somehow different.

According to whom? The world according to Kathy, that’s who.

As if my little pea brain knew the path for each soul, the perfect way of being for each person, and the simple solution for each complex situation for humanity and the planet.  I had noticed (countless times) how my mind wandered into uncomfortable dark places when I argued with how Life was showing up.  That was a million times worse than losing my focus while lifting weights.  Yet, meandering within my ruminating mind was a well developed habit.  

Waging war on what the moment presented, I was disrupting the peace within me.  Every. Single. Time.  

So, apparently Life speaks loudly during my workouts.  I’m all in.  Knowing I absolutely have the clarity, capability, and desire to dive deep into my own conditioned beliefs in order to release them. 

This is the decade I change the world.  My world. 

Which holds all of you. I’m looking forward to discovering even more of the freedom, peace, and love that (already) inhabit this beautiful life.  And to see you much more clearly once I clear up my distortions.

If you’re a bit stuck in the negative mind, don’t despair. That is the trait all we mere mortals share.  Be gentle with yourself while remaining fiercely focused on uncovering all those beliefs which keep you bound. If you need some help with this, I’m happy to help. 

And if you think that the world is going to hell in a hand basket, check out The Decade in Cheer.   

A friend turned me on to David Byrne’s newsletter “Reasons to be Cheerful.” (Who else loved the Talking Heads?)  In their words: “Reasons to be Cheerful is a non-profit editorial project that is tonic for tumultuous times.  We tell stories that reveal there are, in fact, a surprising number of reasons to feel cheerful.” 

Okay, so maybe me finishing strong that one fitness class isn’t earth shattering news. 

But, I gotta tell you.  I walked out of there with a bit of bounce in my step (and no shaking in my biceps), so I’m cheerfully sharing this story.

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

Good news about exercise! Over time, regular exercise remodels the brain’s reward system (higher circulating levels of dopamine & more available dopamine receptors). Helping you anticipate pleasure, feel motivated, and maintain hope. Exercise is helpful in relieving depression, repairing neurological damage caused by addiction, and expanding your capacity for joy. Especially important as you age. Compared with inactive peers, older adults who exercised have brain reward systems resembling people who are decades younger.  Decades, people. Get moving!

Posted on by

I am a Dog

I was playing  the game “Headbands” with my dog the other day.

He seemed to have a hard time guessing what his card said. 

Australian Shepards are supposed to be smart, so I wasn’t sure why he was having such a hard time.

He played the game well as he sought clues in the yes/no answers to his questions.  “Am I an animal?  Do I have four legs?  Do I chase balls?  Do I  live with a great family?”  Yet he couldn’t seem to grasp the correct answer … “I am a dog.”  I thought maybe he was losing his mojo. 

Then he looked at me with that all knowing gaze and I finally got it. 

He was beyond smart.  

He was wise ... playing the game while knowing the whole time it was a "game."

So when he asked me the next question “Am I the infinite, interconnected, harmonious flow of energy that many call LOVE which is also known as the fabric of the Universe?”  I simply said yes.

We stopped playing the game at that point. 

Instead we walked outside marveling at the how the natural world was doing its thing. As if it knew exactly what to do and how to do it.  I had plenty of time to notice the sights, smells, colors, and surprises as he frequently stopped to “smell the roses” and water everything else.  It was really more of a meander than a walk. Giving me the opportunity to notice that I experienced more of nature’s gifts with him than walking on my own.  

Such a wise teacher, this “dog.”  

Sometimes he surprises me. Like the day he taught me that size is relative and perception is in the … perception … of the beholder. Illustrated by the photo below.

I wish he had taught my physics class. 

I might have actually learned something and had a lot more fun.  It would have been a “sweet” experience.

I also appreciate how he demonstrates how to Be in the Now. 

Eckhart Tolle has nothing on him when I walk in the door to be greeted as if I appeared out of thin air.  What a celebration of the miracle of “walking in” to a new scene … a new moment.  The energy is contagious and I totally understand why dogs wag their tails and people spontaneously offer up the “happy dance.” 

When I pop out to the car to get my last bag and return 15 seconds later to the same response, I don’t know whether to value the ability to be truly and delightfully present or check for dementia. 

Just when I think I know something, he reminds me that not everything is as it seems. 

Like when he quizzes me on the nature of reality with questions like “what is real?” and “who am I really?”  I just never know what “game” he will come up with next.  

One thing I know for sure, I have a lot to learn from that wise being I thought was a dog.  

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

Most agree pets are therapeutic. But a robotic seal? In Japan, Paro has been offering companionship to nursing home patients since 2005. The seniors love this furry animatronic seal! Japan’s National Institute of Advanced Industrial Science and Technology found interactions with Paro improved mental sharpness in Alzheimer’s and dementia patients. Best results were from those reporting Paro enjoyment. Seems that furry robot boosts moods and increases resistant to stress. Robot seal love – my new favorite thing.

Posted on by

You. Kindness. Presence. Love.

I’m all set.

Everything is purchased, wrapped, chopped, and decorated. My home is warm with cheer, twinkling lights on the tree, classic carols cascading through the soundscape, and a sense of childlike wonder in the air. With conscious intent this year, everything was easy and delightful.  

Intent is everything. 

But you already know this. 

As I head into Soul Sanctuary today, I am saturated in the Light and in the Wonder of Living.

I am grateful to be here. On this planet and in this life with every joy and every challenge that is revealing itself at this time. 

I choose this. Choice is everything. 

But you already know this. 

In this Season of Light, I hope you also know that You are Precious.

You came in this way and nothing that ever happened in your life could tarnish this preciousness. It is still shining and I see this in you. 

You have so much potential and it has a natural capacity to emerge.

I hope you let it out – the world needs what you have to share. Life has a way of growing itself if you give it a little attention, love, and belief in your own magical abilities.

You are a creative wonder! This is something worth celebrating.

Everything in your life is evidence of this. If you don’t like what is showing up within and around you, you can choose to change this. You can create even higher good for yourself and others. Adopt a child’s playful, delighted sense of wonder. This is within you somewhere and it can be resurrected – even if it wasn’t part of your own history.

You are lovable simply because you exist. 

 

You need not earn love, only claim it. Start within, start today, and forget your history. You can choose this. I hope the Light awakens within you a desire to fall so in love with yourself that you can’t help but shine like the brightest star (even when you feel like you are underwater).

Your Presence is a blessing to this world. 

Deep within you, this Truth is already known and pulsing. You are the Light of the world. When you acknowledge this, the Light begins to shine of its own accord. You can start by opening a crack in that brilliant protection system that all humans share. Just a crack – let that Light out. The Light knows what to do and this beautiful world can use a bit more Light … flowing uniquely through you. 

It doesn’t take a genius to to know this about you.

However, it is more likely to be seen when you treat yourself with the type of kindness that is unrelenting and all encompassing. No matter what you think, do, have become, or failed to become (yet), you choose to treat yourself with a crazy level of kindness. Crazy, genius strategy.

Your Presence, your Kindness, your Love. This is what the world needs now.

Why not start with yourself? And then your family, friends, strangers, and those lost to their own Light. Find all the generosity buried within you to fully be with every loving person, grumpy troll, jolly elf, and irritating aspect of yourself and others. Giving leads to getting the same (it’s a brain thing).

Whether this is a happy, grief filled, busy, or lonely holiday Season of Light, I wish for you to remember the preciousness of your Being. 

The greatest gift I can offer you is my commitment to grow into a better human being. One who is filled with so much kindness, love, and appreciation for myself. So full that it is easy to spill over and see your preciousness, potential, creativity, lovability, and the wonder of your existence in every moment. I choose this. Join me if you will.

May you Remember your Light and turn it up a bit.

Thank you for Being. You. Beautiful. Worthy. Lovable. Here.

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

Research at Rutgers, a local NJ university, highlights the benefit of appreciating the little and big things in life. Seven aspects of appreciation were evaluated, included gratitude, awe, and connecting with the present moment. While appreciation and gratitude both seem to be strongly connected to happiness, results suggest that appreciation is twice as significant as gratitude in determining overall satisfaction with life. Twice as significant. You can apply these findings practically by savoring the positive aspects of your life, valuing friends and family, celebrating the good times, and spending time outdoors. One caveat: don’t make appreciate a rote habit. Cultivate a fluid, delightful practice of appreciation.

Posted on by

Tune into the Sacred

I was singing Christmas Carols in my car the other day when an advertisement for a senior assisted living community came on the radio.

The peppy announcer revealed that my holiday could be a bit brighter if I looked into arranging my every need at this facility.  A must for my holiday gift list with a side of peace of mind in the New Year.

This caught my attention. What did long term health care for the elderly have to do with this Christmas season, I wondered.

As the next ad announced the perfect gift of an oil change and safety check on my vehicle and promised holiday delight and peace on Earth, I was intrigued. I began to listen in earnest to the ads sprinkled between the holiday classics.

How many ways were there to spruce up my holiday, family happiness, and overall wellbeing?

Apparently, I could do this with fast food, slow food, appliances, clothing, travel, pet supplies, and eyeglasses. Who knew that holiday cheer was so abundantly available and that Santa had sold out on every level imaginable!

Interspersed within the traditional carols and local high schools rearranging the classics, were a few songs of devotion.

Oh Holy Night. The Sacred Light appeared on Earth. This invitation seemed quieter and sturdier than the garish promises of a consumer soaked culture desperate for just the thing to right the tilt of a world gone astray.

I felt a deep resonance within the story of the birthing of the Sacred Light.

The light shimmered in every traffic light, headlamp, and reflection. Here was the longevity of something that always was and always will be available. Right now, this Light was not so much needing to be purchased as it was ready to be opened. 

Despite the mad seeking for the perfect gift all around me, I became aware of the deep potential to saturate within this Light.

Turning off the noise of the radio, I drove within the silent harmony of this invitation as the Light reflected within, around, and without.

Everything mundane and magical shimmered as the Light danced with every form and every idea.

Every magical idea of Santa and every belief that gifts would brighten our lives became understandable. The manipulation of this Sacredness, be it in consumerism or religion, was innocent within this dance. Absolutely everything could be enjoyed, valued, and shared.

 

This Sacred Light was simply available without concern for how it was depicted, missed, or distorted.

 

With gratitude I turned the radio on again and let the Light pour through my heart as I sang the songs and honored the silliness of the advertisements.

I was Light Soaked through and through – ready for Santa, ready for the birthing, and open to goodwill and peace on Earth.

I believed in the goodness of humankind and the potential for evolving into the luminous human. I returned to the magic of generosity, love, and receptivity be it in our hearts, our homes, or through kind acts. I felt the cheery “ho ho ho” harmonize alongside the soaring Angelic choir and the grinch persona within.

I was infused with the Light and tuned into the Sacred. All without stepping into the mall. 

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

In a world of consumerism, it is important to expand your understanding of how you consume.  Research has shown when you witness an event (think tv commercial, youtube, news cast), mirror neurons in the brain light up as if you are performing the event yourself.  Thinking about exercise has been found to build muscle mass. The contagion effect explains why being part of a crowd bursting with negative energy leaves you angry or unsettled. You are a consumer of all things that you notice. And influenced by more things than you realize. Get conscious about what and how you consume. Eat more light.