Month: April 2022

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Ilionor is Graduating! Celebrating Love O

My heart is full as I contemplate the wonder of the oldest Love Orphanage child graduating high school.   

Going to school in Haiti is for the privileged few who can afford the yearly tuition. Without a public education system funded by the government, Haitians are left to their own to access education.

The tuition of $250/year is out of reach for the majority of Haitians who live on under $2/day.

Prior to the creation of the Be a Difference Maker program, none of the Love O children had ever been to school. With the daily challenge of survival of 19 children, Gabriel knew that education was out of reach. His focus was upon healing the physical and emotional traumas of the children abandoned or orphaned by the 2010 earthquake.

Ilionor is 21 and graduating high school which goes through grade 13 in Haiti. 

As the oldest young man at Love O, he supports Gabriel and has been considered staff after turning 18. This is necessary for him to remain at Love O and continue his education. (He is standing on far left of photo.)

Ilionor’s success poses a new challenge for Love O.

What are the next educational opportunities for Ilionor and the girls who will graduate next year? Identifying options, cost, and logistical details is the next step. What technical school will provide a livelihood and match their interests and gifts?

So how do we, the extended Love O family around the world, celebrate and how do we fund the future? Let’s do both!

We are celebrating and looking to funding future education with the Love O Coffee House!

 

We’ll gather at Studio 67 in Medford on Thursday, June 9th to celebrate with music, friends, and dessert.

We are graced by the musical talents of Sharis Swartley and Norm Taylor. They bring such passion to their performance and have both been long term supporters of the kids at Love O.  Studio 67 is an artsy setting in the old feed mill. You’ll be surrounded by beautiful art, yummy sweets and the chance to celebrate Ilionor’s success. 

We’ll share the photos and some video from the evening with Gabriel so the Love O family will feel our love and support. 

My heart is especially full as my daughter created the Be a Difference Maker program when she was in 8th grade and entering high school.  She visited Love O with us for three summers during high school and was able to watch the children grow. And now, as Ilioner represents the fruit of that first seed, she graduates from college. It is a sweet time filled with tremendous gratitude.

I’d invite you to join us in opening the way for further education for the Love O kids.

If you’re local, please come to the Be a Difference Maker Coffee House and join us in the live celebration. For those who can’t join us for any reason, you are welcome to make a donation to support this educational dream.

Here’s the link for tickets which will take you to the Event Bee site. 

If you’re purchasing a ticket but not attending, please add that in the comments. (100% of donations to We the Village are applied to the Be Difference Maker program. I have no access to information about financial contributions.)

We look forward to celebrating Ilionor and receiving the musical gifts from Norm and Sharis.

Thanks so much for your support. It really does take a Village.

 

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

I call Gabriel Fedulus an angel. A humble man, he answered the call to help the orphaned children after the 2010 earthquake. What did he do? Gave up his job as a translator and home in Miami and returned to Haiti to gather up some kids. And raise them. He kept gathering until he had 19. He is still raising them. Even as some leave and other little ones arrive. He manages to find food, fill their hearts with love, create safety, and solve the multitude of challenges that Haitians face every day. Especially in these turbulent times on that little island. I call him the Angel Gabriel. He dismisses that name, but I think it fits and I’m keeping it. 

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Reviving the Thank You Note


I received a thank you note from a young woman as her assignment for a college psychology class.

This unexpected delight had a bonus: it was delivered in person and read aloud to me. The shared sentiment was beautiful and felt lovely to receive, yet the best was yet to come.

In the midst of reading through tears and smiles, she stopped to exclaim “I am just so proud of myself!”

We both overflowed with happiness in that moment. It was thrilling to witness her realization that she was the one who had orchestrated her own transformation. Happy dance. Hug. Tissues.

This made me write a global thank you note to all psychology teachers.

“Thank you for teaching the students the positive benefits of gratitude via writing thank you notes. I’ve received a few of these in my life and they meant the world to me. I’ve felt such appreciation for the writer, been inspired by their courage and kindness, and was motivated to continue helping others. This real life teaching tool worked both ways and led me to realize the importance of sending my own thank you notes.”

I remember writing thank you notes as a child after every birthday, Christmas, and special occasion.

Truth be told, I did them because I was required to by my parents. It was a struggle to fill those small notes with the right words that somehow conveyed my gratitude without sounding scripted. I truly felt the appreciation for people’s kindness, yet it was an awkward task as a child and teen to translate my feeling into the written word.

As an adult who has grown into the comfort of expressing gratitude with words, it is now a pleasure to write, type, text, or voice my appreciation. I do it often.

“Dear Mom and Dad, thanks so much for holding me responsible for sending thank you notes for every darn gift I ever received. I didn’t know it at the time, but that practice created a beautiful mindset and lifetime habit of translating my feelings of gratitude into action. I never thought of the impact a thank you note had on another person when I was a kid. I get it now.”

Research in positive psychology, brain science, and mindbody medicine have demonstrated that practicing gratitude has the potential to lead to greater happiness and health.

Cultivating gratitude as a mindset may increase levels of self-esteem, optimism, and empathy, as well as bolster your immune system, decrease stress, and improve sleep. As expected, feeling gratitude and taking the action to express your appreciation has the potential to improve relationships.

When you take the action, such as writing a thank you note, you are bringing the inner feeling of gratitude into form.

Not all thank you notes have to be delivered.

 

When you are engaged in a healing process after someone hurt you, you may come to a time when your gratitude and compassion inform your understanding.

The thank you note becomes a ritual of release and forgiveness as the self empowering action of healing emerges.

Write from the heart, read it aloud, and then rip it up to let the energy flow out from your newfound understanding into the world.

This ritual empowers you to transcend challenging times and define how you choose to be present in your life.

Ripples of healing happen in the world even when you’re not directly communicating your feelings or new understanding.

Imagine a world where you mindfully considered the gifts given by others, large and small, and took the time to share your heartfelt appreciation for the giver and the impact on your life.

Exciting discoveries in neuroscience reveal that your brain responds to offering and receiving appreciation. You are actually wired to “catch” the feeling of gratitude.

When someone shares why they’re grateful for you, it inspires you to step into that higher version of yourself. And pay it forward. Very quickly the ripple effect of gratitude is felt in your body, mind, energy, and your relationships. It becomes second nature to share your appreciation with strangers and pause to let those you work, play, and live with know why you are grateful for them.

Should you text, call, write a thank you note, or send a gift of gratitude?

That’s totally up to you. Yet, I’ll make a suggestion. Do your own research. How does it feel to quickly fire off a text of thanks. Or receive one. How does that compare with taking the time to write and mail a handwritten note. Or receive one. Is there any added benefit by adding an in person call, a hug, or bringing a small gift? Or receiving any of the above.

Gratitude enhances wellbeing. It changes how you relate to the world from the inside out.

And thus, it changes the world from the outside in. Thanks for that. I’m really excited to live in a world with a human family who easily expresses appreciation and goes out of their way to let others know why they matter.

Design your own gratitude experiment.

And someday in the future, drop me a line to let me know how it’s going.

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

Positive psychology researcher Martin Seligman explored 5 different gratitude practices. Writing and delivering a detailed Gratitude Letter had the greatest positive impact on happiness, measured one month later, of the 5 practices. Participants who received the greatest benefit delivered and read the letter aloud versus those who merely mailed it. Yet, 6 months after delivering the Gratitude Letter, participants’ happiness levels dropped back to where they were prior their gratitude visit. It’s time to put pen to paper, forgo the stamp and show up in person. Repeat often.

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Locked Out: Challenge or Invitation?

I needed to make a few new keys for Soul Sanctuary.

Three keys to be precise. I needed them this week, so I cancelled my pedicure to fit in a quick trip to Home Depot. The key lady was helpful and challenging. She asked me if I wanted to know something about sunflowers since I picked a key with that design.

“Yes. Tell me.”

I proceeded to receive a barrage of questions “Do you know why ….” to which my answer was always “no.” The interesting information being delivered was interspersed by comments about how stupid and lazy people are because they don’t do research on their own.

I breathed deeply as the questioning and commentary became intense.

“No, tell me. No, teach me.” I was a bit battered, but also a wee bit interested even while I was dodging verbal shrapnel. Among other things, I learned the best place to plant a garden and to not to plant vegetables until the soil is 55 degrees. Do you need a “soil thermometer?” Nope. Just check the ocean temperature which is within 1 to 2 degrees of soil temperature. Fascinating. (Don’t take my word for it. I learned it’s best to do your own research.)

I left with 3 beautiful keys, a few facts, and a need to breathe deeply.

When I got to work the next day, none of my keys worked. I put that errand aside as I was running a retreat out of town. Returning on Sunday night, I picked up the dog, returned to Soul Sanctuary to unpack my retreat materials and headed home for a late dinner. Pulling into the garage, I realized I needed those keys and only had 40 minutes until Home Depot closed for the evening.

Tired and hungry, I headed out into the dark night.

I was helped promptly and in silence. It was a peaceful, easy venture into this massive store. I left with three new keys, feeling all was well and in good order.

Monday morning arrived and none of the keys worked.

I headed to the local wise man – Eddie – who has taken care of every maintenance issue for Soul Sanctuary for the past 10 years. “Don’t go to Home Depot, go to the local Moorestown hardware store!” He gave me directions, but I couldn’t picture the location. Someone else told me of another hardware store which was convenient and known to me. Off I went to that which was familiar.

I chose 3 different designs, paid more money, and returned to Soul Sanctuary to find the keys didn’t work. Not a one.

At this point I figured out that this had something to do with me. I was locked out of Soul Sanctuary. Just as it was opening for others. Just as I was stepping onto a new path in my personal journey. Hmmm. I started Treasure Mapping backwards to notice the clues.

First key: I was shown to listen carefully, be a know nothing, and be teachable.

Second key: I left the comfort of home to go out in the dark night even when hungry and tired.

Third key: I sought wise counsel, but ignored it in favor of seeking a familiar place over the unknown.

I went back to Eddie. Determined to listen. I had to search for him as he had moved locations. He shook his head and gave me the same directions. That unfamiliar hardware store was easy to find and surprisingly interesting. When explaining what happened, this kind man suggested taking one key to make sure it worked.

Nothing fancy this time, just a basic $2 key.

It didn’t work. Confirmation that this was definitely about the Mystery of my new unfolding path.

 

I searched for Eddie as he was on the move again. More seek and find.

He was surprised and went to get the office duplicate keys. “Come on,” he said, “let’s solve this mystery.” (Told you he was a wise man. He knew something was going on.) The new key didn’t work. His office keys worked. My key worked.

“Let me see all the keys.”

The new key didn’t match the office key. “It’s a different key! It doesn’t match up.” Eddie exclaimed. My key matched the new key which didn’t work. My key matched the office key which did work. Eddie shook his head. “This is a mystery, but these things happen to you and Soul Sanctuary.” And Eddie the Wise Man handed over the two office keys that worked. “Take these.”

Fourth key: Mystery happens. Be alert and open to what beckons along the Path without needing to solve or understand everything that happens.

Fifth key: When a Wise Man offers help, accept it.

When life offers a challenge, mild or grand, you are at choice. You may view the situation at the level of the mundane world or to recognize an unfolding of some intelligent guidance pointing to something you can not yet see. And written in a language that is difficult to translate. Offering guidance in various forms to point you to the next step.

As you navigate challenges in the material world, remember to seek the deeper invitation, which is often delivered via code, hidden keys, and unfamiliar maps.

If you’re interested in developing the skill of Treasure Mapping for clues, please join me on Saturday April 23rd.

You’ll playfully discover Soul Sanctuary to be a wise oracle which partners with your intuitive nature to offer guidance for your life. Link and details in the blue box below.

 

Peace be with you and with all.  No exceptions. 

HeartWarming

 News

Many cognitive scientists argue that intuitive and analytic thinking shouldn’t be viewed as opposites. Studies indicate that decision-making often works best when blending both strategies. Whether you rely on analysis of data or trust your gut to make a decision depends on a variety of factors, such as the simplicity or the complexity of the problem and your past experiences with similar situations. Economics Nobel laureate Daniel Kahneman theorizes that intuitive thinking is faster than a rational approach but more prone to error.