Am I Present?
I was lost in a dream the other day. Caught up in an old story about how to live life – my way.
I felt the stress of this dream – occurring in the light of day with eyes wide open. This was my clue that I was dreaming. Stress – a friendly reminder that I had my knickers in a knot over something I thought was a problem. I noticed my tension and took a breath. Enjoying another deep breath, I asked one question:
“Am I present?”
Of course this is a trick question. Each time stress offers the invitation to ask this of myself, the answer is the same: “No, I am not present. I am lost in the story of me and the way life should be.” Yet, the beauty of this undefended awareness is the opening of potential of noticing what is here. What would happen if I took a few minutes to really notice what was happening?
“Noticing” is a simple practice which has the potential to bring you rapidly into contact with what is happening.
It is so simple that this powerful practice is often engaged in a cursory fashion or overlooked altogether. This is especially true in our fast paced, self important culture. Silly really – this wasting of our precious engagement with Life – in order to get one more thing done, to get someplace faster, or to stay lost in our storyline just a wee bit longer.
So, I drop within the moment and notice.
I breathe consciously and tune into my body. The breath moves me in unpredictable patterns if I let it, as if there is a wisdom in the rising and falling code that unlocks tension I did not realize was there. When I notice my body, places of tightness automatically soften as if they were just waiting for my glance in order to relax. My posture shifts. I feel younger, gentler, and more trusting.
It doesn’t matter why my mind is scattered, my body tight, my breathing shallow, or my attention turned inward.
Without a need to know anything, I just allow the breath and inner awareness to move as it will. Everything breathes, softens, and opens. This happens rapidly when I enter the action of noticing with an open mind and heart, willing to be with whatever I encounter without having to create a story about it.
At some point, without effort, my noticing turns to my environment.
The texture of the fabric of my clothing or furniture, the sounds near and far which harmonize with the movement of the light and my breath, the array of colors and objects patiently waiting to be seen. As my awareness broadens, the perceptions integrate into a living story worth exploring.
I realize that my stress has dissipated – my personal story has dissolved.
I recognize the awareness of one pulsating, moving presence. There is a conversation occurring – Life is speaking and Life is listening – and I am that. The wisdom flows unimpeded and is easily translated within this relaxed Presencing experience.
I realize that my stress has dissipated. My personal story has dissolved.
Ah yes. This Presence. So familiar once noticed.
It seems surprising that I had forgotten this way of being – so real and true. And yet, it is understood that dreaming is a habit. Not only mine, but a habit for most. This makes me even more grateful for the question that arises within me, unbidden now, at times when I am lost in the old stories. I welcome the trickster who lives within the question like I welcome an old friend who knows me well and cares for me deeply.
“Am I present?” always leads me down a rabbit hole worth exploring.
Like one of my favorite mythical heroes, Alice in Wonderland, I may remember more than I expected when I venture down the path of this exploration. Simple enough, this practice of noticing. Yet powerful enough to boost my intuition so I can tune in more fully to the Divine conversation.
I was lost in a dream yesterday.
Asking myself the question “Am I present?” This automatically interrupted some nonsensical story and dropped me into breathing and noticing.
And then I woke up.
In my pajamas, in my bed, while it was dark and the birds had yet to sing. I took a breath. I noticed my body, my bed, my room, and beyond within. Grateful for this habit that empowers me even when I sleep.
So dreamy. This sense of wakefulness.
Peace be with you and with all. No exceptions.
HeartWarming
News
Multitasking is touted as the super power which guarantees success. That’s a myth. Rather than helping you accomplish more things faster, it actually interferes with you doing anything well. The benefits of the well known adage “Be here now” are backed up by science. Slowing your pace and placing attention on what is right in front of you has been shown to increase productivity, happiness, and …wait for it … charisma. When you’re fully present, people feel understood and supported. Increasing potential for positive relationships, which are one of the strongest predictors of happiness and success. Bust that myth.
